Wednesday, June 29, 2011

DENVER HAZE...

by Tallulah Lastname, Company Clerk:
Unflattering Portrait Poster

The Misanthrope Specialty Co. will soon be breezing through Denver, Colorado, and is parlaying its visit into an evening of Unflattering Portraits, by donation, this Friday at Fancy Tiger.

Jim

To book your portrait appointment: simply click on the comments section at the end of this posting and claim any hour that isn't already claimed. Sign ups are open until midnight the night before. They take about thirty to fifty minutes per person. Couples, oddly enough, count as two persons, so please book two slots.

UNFLATTERING DENVER
Friday July 1, 2011
FANCY TIGER BOUTIQUE
14 S. Broadway

Denver, CO


7:pm - Available

8:pm - Sarah

9:pm - "Pink"

Punctuality, by the way, is always in fashion. Please be aware that patrons arriving more than eight minutes late for their scheduled sitting will not be served.

* * *

Sunday, June 19, 2011

STRIKING IT BITCH...

by Erkuden Sakana, Company Secretary:
"Stupid Fucking Moron"
("Stupid Fucking Moron" by the men and women of the Company)

The wheels of industry are once again churning at the M.S.Co. The Europeans have arrived in Toronto, hunkering down with the others in the Company Bunker, and T-Bone and Cotton have joined up with the Away Team. This amalgamation of previously spread out Misanthropes into two distinct camps leaves the Company in a better position to ride out this protracted postal strike. The harumphing is subsiding.

Ofcourse, even with the consolidation of membership and amended protocols, circumstances still preclude the needle on the Company Catastrophometer from going all the way back down business as usual levels. Canada Post's indisposition cannot be ignored completely.

Closed
Online and mail-order purchase of Company wares remains unavailable

The exchange of certain supplies and sundry secret goods between Headquarters and the Away Team remains vital to Company operations. Relying on services of FedEx and UPS as alternatives, keeps the traffic flowing, but take their toll on Company coffers. These are also not viable alternatives when it comes to the Company's mail-order business and Etsy shop. The M.S.Co. retail division consequently remain closed.

* * *

The strike also calls for the revision many of T-Bone's plans, along with the Company's plans for him.

"T-Bone"
Portrait of the Company's intrepid Bailiff


With Mr. Bonaparte now tethered to the Away Team, the M.S.Co. regretfully announces the suspension of this year's instalments of his popular Notes to Headquarters travel supplement. Hopefully it doesn't need to be cancelled altogether. Last year's compilation of T-Bone and Cotton's adventures was a runaway hit with subscribers to the Company Espistolary Service.

Then there's the Motel Bible Project...

In a concerted effort to help T-Bone complete his mission, the Company has decided to adopt the project as an M.S.Co. subsidiary. Strategies are being devised to cover more ground, making up for lost time.

Motel Mote
(photo by Cottonwood Fields)

The members of the Away Team will henceforth endeavour check into separate motel rooms, or, when possible, separate motels, switching bibles out as per T-Bones specific instructions.

* * * *

THIS WEEK'S PRODUCTIVITY REPORT
Number of illustration initiated: 39
Number completed: 25
Number inducted: 11
Carried over to next week: 5

* * * *

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

BOSTON SCREAM...

by Rufus Spaulding:
Bazaar Bizarre

The Company will soon be making its merry way back up North, to participate in this weekend's Bazaar Bizarre in Boston. And yes, before you ask, Unflattering Portraits will infact be available, live, on the spot, and by donation.

Come and find the Misanthrope Specialty Co. at booth #9. They'll be sharing a tent with the Sweetie Pie Press.

unflattering stephen

To book your portrait appointment: simply click on the comments section at the end of this posting and claim any hour that isn't already claimed. Sign ups are open until midnight the night before. They take about thirty to fifty minutes per person. Couples, oddly enough, count as two persons, so book two slots.

UNFLATTERING BOSTON
Sunday June 19, 2011
Union Square
Somerville, MA

1 pm - Available
2 pm - Available
3 pm - Lunch time
4 pm - Available
5 pm - Available


Punctuality, by the way, is always in fashion. Please be aware that patrons arriving more than eight minutes late for their scheduled sitting will not be served.

* * *

Sunday, June 12, 2011

PEACH BLANKET BINGO...

by Erkuden Sakana, Company Secretary:
"Pothole View"
"Porthole View" by the M.S.Co.

The M.S.Co. is doing its best to work around the continuing labour disputes between Canada Post and the postal workers' union by reducing the need to mail work back and forth between the various members of the Company. The Miner's Prayer, and Montréal misanthropes have assembled in Toronto, and the European contingents may soon be on their way. T-Bone, too, is putting his side project on hold and is en route to rejoin the away team.

Protocols are also being reworked to circumnavigate reliance on the postal system. The Away Team and Toronto camps will henceforth operate, partially, as separate entities; holding on to a percentage of their respective illustrations for completion, evaluation and induction independent of the other team.

* * *

Tofu Baby
Unflattering Portrait of Tofu Baby

Down in the Peach State, the touring misanthropes had their hands full this weekend, representing the Company at I.C.E. Atlanta. Once the show was rapped up, the convoy headed over to Athens, Georgia to carry out their secret meeting and drawing session. They are holed up at Rancho Cocoa, hosted by longtime allies, the French Toasts.

Knock knock
Hanging out with Tofu Baby at Rancho Cocoa

Raul and Missy have built an impenetrable fortress of cuteness, candy, cakes, bunnies and cats. How they get away with all this adorable sweetness without making everyone puke is a mystery for the ages. Even the sourest of misanthropes can't resist the sugar-powered giddiness of Rancho Cocoa for long. As a result, it looks like results of this week's away team drawing session might boast a record number of uncharacteristically darling, even dainty illustrations.

happy cake
Rancho Cocoa's infectious joy is fuelled by equal parts cuteness and icing sugar

* * * *

THIS WEEK'S PRODUCTIVITY REPORT
Number of illustration initiated: 34
Number completed: 17
Number inducted: 7
Carried over to next week: 6

* * *

Thursday, June 9, 2011

I.C.E. TO MEET YOU...

by Tallulah Lastname, Company Clerk:
ICE

Just a reminder to the citizens of Atlanta: The great big I.C.E. extravaganza takes place this weekend, and the M.S.Co. is en route to Georgia to ply its trade on an unsuspecting public.

INDIE CRAFT EXPERIENCE
June 11 and 12, 2011
11am to 6pm

Ambient Plus Studio
585 Wells St. SW
Atlanta, Georgia

Admission: $5

ICE MAP BOOTH

Although the misanthropes are no strangers to Atlanta, this will be the Company's first time partaking in the the activities at I.C.E. There will be vendors galore, music, and plenty of good eating. The Company will be sharing a space with fellow first-time I.C.E.-er, the Sweetie Pie Press. Be sure drop by booth 83, and buy all the buttons and M.S.Co. goodies your strongest man can carry.

(Indie Craft Experience)

And don't forget to book your appointment for an Unflattering Portrait. The Company will be drawing all portraits by donation.

* * *

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

HOLIEST OF WHOLLY...

by Tallulah Lastname, Company Clerk:
Wholly Craft
(photo by Cottonwood Fields)

The Company away team has pulled up its stakes and and is on it's way South to Atlanta. But before leaving Columbus, they made sure to drop by Wholly Craft, to restock the shelves with all manner of M.S.Co. goods.

Wholly Craft
(photo by Cottonwood Fields)

Wholly Craft was one of the first retailers to carry Company merchandise, way back when. Proprietor Olivera Bratich always been a pleasure to deal with, and has become a true friend to many of the travelling misanthropes, opening her home to the weary travellers and often providing them with a place to sleep and work.

Wholly Craft
(photo by Cottonwood Fields)

The store is not just a purveyor of handmade goods, but a strong proponent of handiwork in general; hosting events, workshops in both crafts and business development, and fostering close ties with the community. Bratich is truly a business woman with a mission.

* * *

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

THIRTEEN WITH DISASTER...

by Tallulah Lastname, Company Clerk:
postcard nashville

T-Bone and Cotton are in Nashville, Tennessee. They were briefly joined by an additional hand-picked team of rag-tag Misanthropes, sent by Madame X to aid in the carrying out of yet another offshoot errand. The extra manpower was dispatched once it was learned that T-Bone's mission in the Music City coincided with the emergence of Brood XIX; a loud-buzzing swarm of cicadas that rises up by the millions out of the ground every thirteen years.


(Brood XIX in action)

Also known as the Great Southern Brood, this is the largest brood of thirteen-year cicadas, they're out in record numbers this year. The air is lousy with them. After over a decade of lying in wait as underground grubs, they have finally emerged; taking to the sky in the desperate hopes of humping and laying eggs in these last few days of their lives.

cicadas in the doorway
An overnight accumulation of dead bugs under T-Bone's
porch light (photo by T-Bone)


The streets are littered with big dead bugs. They're flying into people's faces, and bumping feverishly into streetlights all night. Cicadas are dropping dead, mid-flight, or raining down from the trees like autumn leaves, and the Misanthropes are collecting as many of the carcasses as they can.

Just as was the case with the Company's collection of ball moss in Austin, many of the local are thankful for Misanthropes ridding their properties of this perceived eye-sore, going so far as to make a financial contribution to the effort.

box of secadas
(photo by Reverend Aitor)

But all this raking up of expired insects is motivated by more than some sense of civic duty. The cicadas are being boxed up and shipped back to the Company's MVSEVM.

Already, there are five kilos of cicadas are on their way to Toronto, and the Nashville expedition is still gathering even more more.Madame X, the MVSEVM's curator, has plans for this bounty of specimens. Big plans.

* * *

Sunday, June 5, 2011

NIGHTS of COLUMBUS...

by Erkuden Sakana, Company Secretary:
post box
(photo by Erkuden Sakana)

Canada's postal workers are on strike. And despite the National Post's groundbreaking article, wondering if, in the age of e-mail, texts, and twitter, anyone will even notice, the absence of mail does infact affect many, including the M.S.Co.


(The news)

With much of the Company's work in progress stuck in transit, this marks yet another week that the M.S.Co. has failed to induct a single illustration into it's archives. A real thorn in the sides of those members hung up on routine and craving the bureaucratic sense of completion that accompanies the christening of finished drawings and voting on which ones make the cut. Needless to say, this only adds fuel to the harrumphing at M.S.Co. Headquarters.

But it isn't just Company protocols being hindered by the strike. This month's shipment to the Company's mail-order subscribers is also being held hostage by the striking postal workers; as are various, prints, cards and commissioned portraits purchased from the M.S.Co. through its Etsy shop and various other channels.


Even orgonite dealers are being affected by the strike

Rest assured, the Company is taking measures to minimize the impact of this hold-up. The wheels of production do keep turning, despite delays in the postal system. In the meantime, however, the Company has closed down its Etsy shop until further notice.

Link* * *

POSTCARD Columbus

Meanwhile, south of the border, the touring misanthropes have pitched their camp in Ohio. The away team is on a procurement mission, combing Columbus' legendary thrift stores for much-needed supplies, and stocking up on pipe tobacco at Smokers' Haven.

delicious tobacco
(pressed and sliced flakes of delicious, delicious tobacco)

This is one of the Company's preferred brick and mortar tobacconists. Owner Premal Chheda's passion is pipes, and his shop caters primarily to enthusiasts of the brier. There is even a workshop in the back, where pipes may be brought in for repairs and refurbishing, and celebrated pipe maker Bill Shalosky can often be found hard at work on his handmade pipes.

Smokers Haven
(photo by Cottonwood Fields)

The Smokers' Haven gang was kind enough to bring the misanthropes in after hours. This week's away team meeting and illustration session was carried out in the indulgently smoke-friendly luxury of the the store's smoking lounge.

* * * *

THIS WEEK'S PRODUCTIVITY REPORT
Number of illustration initiated: 43
Number completed: 10
Number inducted: 0
Carried over to next week: 27

* * * *

Saturday, June 4, 2011

GIVE PEACH A CHANCE...

by Tallulah Lastname, Company Clerk:
I.C.E Flyer
(I.C.E. flyer courtesy of the Indie Craft Exchange)

That's right folks, M.S.Co. is coming to Hotlanta for the Indie Craft Experience, and bringing its Unflattering Portrait Project with them. What better way to spend a sweltering weekend than at an event acronymed I.C.E., sucking on gourmet popsicles, surrounded by all manner of handmade splendour.

More details on the event will be posted on the Company web log as showtime approaches, but in sign-ups for Unflattering Portraits are open right now.


Eric
(photo by Reverend Aitor)

To book your appointment: simply click on the comments section at the end of this posting and claim any hour that isn't already claimed. Sign ups are open until midnight the day before.

The portraits are done by donation. They take about thirty to fifty minutes per person. Couples, oddly enough, count as two persons, so book two slots. And punctuality is always in fashion. Patrons arriving more than eight minutes late for their scheduled sitting will not be served.

UNFLATTERING I.C.E.
DAY TWO:
Sunday June 12, 2011
1:00 pm - Sydney Huggins + 1
2:00 pm - Sydney Huggins + 1
3:00 pm - Kelsey C.
4:00 pm - Tofu Baby

* * *

Thursday, June 2, 2011

THE SKYLINE'S THE LIMIT...

by Tallulah Lastname, Company Clerk:
Postcard Louisvill

The Company convoy has stopped in Louisville, KY, en route to Columbus, OH. It's a favourite pit stop for many of the misanthropes. A relaxing place to stroll around, restock and sample the various bourbons Kentucky has to offer.
skyline logo
(logo courtesy of Skyline Chili)

While in town, the hungry food tourists of the Company discovered a new regional culinary delight known as as Skyline Chili.

Skyline 4-Way
(photo of deliciousness by Reverend Aitor)

Technically, a Cincinnati restaurant chain, Skyline has made it's inroads into Kentucky. It is loved enough for its chili-based fare to be consider as local Louisville's own hot brown.

Sklyline meal
It's garbage food. But it's delicious garbage food.

Among the restaurant's signature dishes are the 3-, 4-, and 5-Way Chilies. In short, three variation of a plate of steaming spaghetti, smothered in secret recipe chili, covered in finely-shredded cheese. Best when accompanied by a chili dog.


(Skyline Chili 3-Way eating contest)

Named after the view of the Cincinnati skyline founder Nicholas Lambrinides admired from his first restaurant's location, Skyline's chili recipe is a tightly clutched family secret. It's distinct flavour has spawned a number of attempted imitations, giving rise to what is now regarded as Cincinnati-style chili; characterized by a thinner, differently-spiced sauce than that of it's better-known Texas counterpart.

* * *